So She Was Dead

Posted on June 5, 2017


One of our oldest strippers at the club was an ex-crackhead opera singer. Our patrons thought I was too old at 22, so she was dead.

Our dead stripper had to get attention somehow, so she would immediately remove all her clothes as soon as she hit the stage at 10am and bend over backwards into what she coined “the crab walk.”

As a handful of men were delivered their breakfast of soggy burgers by depressed soggy waitresses, she would crab walk over, her hands on her ankles, old pussy fully expressed and yodel her highest operatic pitch. If they still didn’t tip her a dollar, she would annoy them till she did.

No judgment here–I’m currently learning my own crab walk, you?

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